Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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