Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
