my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
