I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
