I accidentally burped into my bong.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
