Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
