i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
love makes seman taste better
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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