I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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