with your own penis?
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
