I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
