Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
