Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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