I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Ketchup is God's man juice
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Randomize
