Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
