so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize