I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
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