Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
