I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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