are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
