Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
