the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
this hospital has no fireball
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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