Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
