You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
