let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
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