I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
