Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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