I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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