so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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