Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
