Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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