forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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