idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
