come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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