i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
