Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
