I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
