I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
