They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
