At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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