God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
