i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I came so hard my ears popped.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
