do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
