You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
it hurts more in the daytime
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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