I queefed so loud it echoed.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
