Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
