Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
