i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
