1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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