5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
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