I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
